Posted by: Modern Mom | February 13, 2012

Hasta, Montana

It’s been 14 years this month since I left Montana. My family has slowly migrated to follow me, but my mom is still in Bozeman. She and my dad have been trying to relocate to the Portland, OR area since my first son was born, nearly four years ago. It’s been an arduous process to say the least.

Finally, after years and years of saying “maybe this year” and “maybe by summer”, we actually have a date. My mom is back home in Bozeman packing up the house, selling things off, taking things to Good Will and getting ready for the big moving day at the end of the month.  My whole immediate family will be relocated to the Portland area by the end of this month.

I can’t even begin to describe how excited I am to have my family close again. It’s been so hard being so far from them all this time. Though I am excited to have my family near me again, it is a little bittersweet. I do miss Montana and all it held for me, and now with no family there I will have no excuse to make the trek back home other than to be a tourist. Bozeman is where home was, where I spent my youth and where I knew I could return. Now I’m not sure how I’ll adjust to not having that anymore.

I’ve always been pretty adaptable and open to change. There are things that have remained constant in my life that allow me the courage to make those drastic changes, and one of those anchors has been Montana. The courage to make a move three states away when I was 21 and had no friends or family to go to came from knowing I had friends and family to go back to if I needed. A place of comfort and familiarity. I spent my youth dreaming of the places I’d go when I grew up, away from Bozeman. So I find myself feeling this very deeply now, “Home is a place you grow up wanting to leave, and grow old wanting to get back to”. John Ed Pearce

I have always had Christmas in Montana, up until 2010 when we did our first Christmas at home instead of traveling. That, I think, is going to be the hardest part for me and my hubby both. We will miss the people we loved visiting during the holiday season. I will miss the beauty and grandeur of the snow under that amazingly huge azure sky. Not that I miss the snow, mind you, but I did enjoy visiting the snow. My family has some wonderful traditions that we are trying to uphold and adapt to life in the Pacific Northwest, but i a afraid they will never be quite the same as they were in Bozeman.

I am excited for this life change and all it brings for me and my family. I anticipate so many wonderful things coming out of it. I know that having my mom closer will be so special for me, especially now that I’m a mom and need her almost more than ever. I look forward to more family activities with my whole family. This is a new chapter for us all, and even though it might be scary, and exciting, and bittersweet, I know it will be a whole new chapter of my life, and my family’s life.

So, with a slightly sad smile and a tip of the hat for my lovely Montana childhood, I say “Hasta, Montana. Hope to see you again soon.”

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